Reverb10: That’s not my name

December 23 – New Name

Let’s meet again, for the first time. If you could introduce yourself to strangers by another name for just one day, what would it be and why?

(Author: Becca Wilcott)

I’m blessed with a complicated first name.  It’s phonetic and easy to spell, but there are many, many similar names, and nobody hears it or spells it right the first time.

So if I got to choose another name, it would be Sam or Julie – something everyone can spell.

Or Tallulah.

Reverb10: Travelling rough

December 22 – Travel

How did you travel in 2010? How and/or where would you like to travel next year?

(Author: Tara Hunt)

I have a gypsy soul.

If I won the lottery tomorrow, I wouldn’t judge the prize against my mortgage, I wouldn’t start day dreaming about a shiny new Audi – I’d be counting how many round the world tickets I could buy.  Or maybe how many months I could afford to live in Spain, Morocco or Thailand.

Things are a little different now.  It’s not so easy to cut and run,  but I still have dreams.

The big dream for this year is Africa.  That was actually the big dream for 2009, but I was big and fat and pregnant, and had to put it aside.

This year I might just have the time and money to pull it off.

Christmas for heathens

Tomorrow the baby and I fly home for Christmas.  There will be lights and trees and presents and too much food and too many relatives.  There will be hugs and kisses and laughter.  I am sure there will be many, many photos.

This post about Christmas for Heathens brought some peace to my heart.

So for all you choose-your-own-adventures kinda spirituality people, have a look.

Merry Christmas.

Reverb10: Dear Me

Dear Me,

Don’t kid yourself, it’s been a bitch of a year.  And no matter how you re-badge things to ‘the year of radical change’ and ‘a chance to find more inspirational work’ – you aren’t done grieving yet.

Looking back, I’m amazed how well you coped, at how compassionate and fair you could be from the midst of your pain.  At the same time, you connected with your mama bear self, and learnt to advocate fiercely for your baby and yourself.  You learnt to be strong without apology, and that is a wonderful thing.

However, I need to warn you about what’s to come.  It feels like the biggest hurdles are behind you, and that’s kind of true.  You feel like you deserve a break, and that’s never been more true.  But there is the temptation now to collapse in a heap and wallow, and you mustn’t give in to that.  Because I know you, and you might never dig yourself out of that wallow again.

2011 has the potential to be the best year yet.  But you have to get out, and get into it.  Start many, many new things – don’t worry about finishing right now, just try everything.  You chose ‘explore’ as the word of the year, so go out and live it.

By the end of the year, you won’t recognise your life.  You and that beautiful boy will be living dreams that you haven’t even thought of yet, and reviving some that you thought were long gone.

Be brave!  Push out into the blue!

with so much love and admiration,

your future self.

Reverb10: Shoulda Coulda Woulda

December 20 – Beyond Avoidance

What should you have done this year but didn’t because you were too scared, worried, unsure, busy or otherwise deterred from doing? (Bonus: Will you do it?)

(Author: Jake Nickell)

There are so many things I should have done this year.  So many things I could have done.
I should have written more – and submitted more.
I should have climbed more, or danced more, or just gone bush more often.
I should have tried harder to heal my relationship, and been brave enough to speak up when my needs weren’t being met.
I should have confronted Ryan about all the pain and sadness I saw in him – but I didn’t, because I didn’t want to find out it was my fault.
But despite all I thought I needed to do, I achieved so much more.
I’ve got my house in order, physically, spiritually and financially.
(well, mostly)
I’ve been the best mama I am, every day.
I’ve found time to be deeply thankful for all of this.
Even though my to-do list is perpetually endless, and the same things keep sifting down to the bottom, life goes on.  I try not to deal in ‘shoulds’.  They wear me out.

Reverb10: Healing

December 19 – Healing

What healed you this year? Was it sudden, or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2011?

(Author: Leoni Allan)

As Leonie asked the question, she also gave the answer:

I’ll always remember 2010 for being the year that took everything away, so I could find myself again.

I can’t say it better than that.

I keep finding little bits of me that have been neglected or forgotten.  There has been some regrets around this, but a lot of joy.  I was talking to a friend today about all my excitement around new possibilities, and he said, “I can see, just thinking about this makes you really smile.”

So among all the face-slapping doh! moments?  There’s a lot of shiny anticipation.  I think that is my big healing for the year.

Thanks for the words, Leonie : )

Reverb10: Trying

December 18 – Try

What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn’t go for it?

(Author: Kaileen Elise)

This year I tried so hard to make things work.

They didn’t.

I tried so hard to fit in.

I didn’t.

I tried so hard to be someone else’s idea of a better me.

I wasn’t.

Everything fell in a heap.  I stopped trying – and things started to sort themselves out.

So this is the year I stop trying, and concentrate on being.