Reverb10: Shoulda Coulda Woulda

December 20 – Beyond Avoidance

What should you have done this year but didn’t because you were too scared, worried, unsure, busy or otherwise deterred from doing? (Bonus: Will you do it?)

(Author: Jake Nickell)

There are so many things I should have done this year.  So many things I could have done.
I should have written more – and submitted more.
I should have climbed more, or danced more, or just gone bush more often.
I should have tried harder to heal my relationship, and been brave enough to speak up when my needs weren’t being met.
I should have confronted Ryan about all the pain and sadness I saw in him – but I didn’t, because I didn’t want to find out it was my fault.
But despite all I thought I needed to do, I achieved so much more.
I’ve got my house in order, physically, spiritually and financially.
(well, mostly)
I’ve been the best mama I am, every day.
I’ve found time to be deeply thankful for all of this.
Even though my to-do list is perpetually endless, and the same things keep sifting down to the bottom, life goes on.  I try not to deal in ‘shoulds’.  They wear me out.

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